Women, I love them. I grew up in a house with six of them, across three generations, me being the only male in the house. Spending so much time with women I went about thinking I was the ultimate female companion, that no other man could understand them like I could. Imagine my utmost shock and surprise when my girlfriend tells me one day that I’m not romantic!
What?! Me?! She gave me an example; one day I was busy when she called me and asked where I was, I told her. She came to my room and told me she was hungry. Tell me, guys, what do you do when you’re hungry? Me, I go out and buy some food, or fruits or maybe fix me a small dish (yes, I can cook, grew up with six women remember?). Being a guy, presented with a problem, straightaway I looked for a solution. I just presumed she didn’t have enough money on her so I gave her some to go buy something, I felt satisfied thinking the situation had been contained.
Later she tells me I handled the situation terribly, (she was serious about this too, kind of complaining) she said I should have gone more along the lines of sympathizing with her state, asked her what she felt like eating and then going with her to get what she wanted, she had the money, she had what she needed to cook, she just wanted to be with me, to get some attention, for us to do something together. She also said I was too “stiff”, that I didn’t take initiative, only did something when she asked me to, wanted me to surprise her more often, she went on and on, basically saying I should think more like a woman.
Shattered my world it did. Stayed up the whole night thinking how wrong I was about being the perfect female companion. She didn’t want to have to tell me what to do, and I understand, she wants to feel like I do those things for her not just because she’s asked me to but because I thought about it myself and I’m doing them from my heart, that way she knows I really mean them.
I am gonna try, be more “romantic”. I always knew getting into a relationship would require me to change but I had no idea it would be this much. So now I hold no illusions, I’m still learning, I know I’ll never understand women, a friend of mine once said the best you can do is know that this is what they do, how they are, but you can never understand or know why. And no matter the situation, guys will always think differently from girls, it’s hardwired into us, from the moment we are born, even before, our hormones make sure of that.
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